My Shame, a story of coming out

My name is Susan and I want to tell you what happened to me
recently. I’m doing this because right now I feel guilt, and remorse,
and most of all because I can’t tell my husband, Peter (not his real
name), but I have to tell someone. Maybe publishing this anonymously
on the web will help cleanse the shame I feel right now. Please do not
think I am writing this to boast about what I did or at the time
wanted. This is a true story and my name really is Susan, but I have
changed other details to remain anonymous.

I live in a major city, lets say, Orlando, Florida. Peter is a
Physician, specializing in facial reconstructive surgery. We are very
well off, residing in a secure, guarded, and private development. The
average cost of a house where I live is in excess of one million
dollars. I married Peter when I was nineteen and have never had to
work or want for anything. My marriage is strong and I love Peter
dearly, but I must admit I become very bored with life at times. Life
with Peter is very structured and always run by the clock. We even
make love on schedule. I have often wondered what it would be like to
have a different lover, who would do different things, other than what
Peter and I do. With Peter our love making is always the same. Not
that it isn’t wonderful, but I always know what to expect. The entire
session may last fifteen minutes, with Peter always on top, and always
climaxing on schedule. I wish sometimes that I could be on top, or
that he would mount me from behind, with my bottom raised high, or
that I could take him in my mouth. Well, I guess I don’t have to
wonder anymore and in some ways I’m glad of what happened. And I guess
also that my shame is somewhat mixed with thoughts of doing it again.
Anyway, this is my story and I hope writing it to so many people
purges the unpleasant feelings that I’ve been getting lately.